Episode 2: Detours

A friend of mine responded to Episode 1 saying that the "meaning" of life is overrated because "[s]earching for such validation risks missing out on what's before your very eyes."

I agree to some extent actually. It's definitely possible that some people are so intent on finding the meaning of their life that they lose sight of some of the smaller things which can be equaly important. They put on blinders and don't look any other way but forward, so life passes by without them fully enjoying the ride.

On the other hand, I personally feel as if I'm able to appreciate the ride even though I'm trying to go in a certain direction. Let's take my weight loss goal for example. Earlier this year, my weight peaked at 119 pounds. I'm only 4'11", so I felt pretty...round. My coworker approached me about doing a Biggest Loser style competition and it turned out to be one of the best decisions of my life. Having others hold me accountable for working hard towards losing weight and reaching my target weight of 105 was a really motivating factor (ok, so was the money involved - biggest loser gets a money pot at the end of each month but that's besides the point). About 4 months later, I finally hit my target weight and am now working towards toning down and building muscle.

It wasn't easy losing all that weight. My lifestyle has changed but it's not like I've given up everything either. Although I did do some crash diets (Slimfast shakes, Master Cleanse detox) to kick start some of the weight loss, I still ate "bad" food every so often. I'm still a sucker for bread. Pizza still sounds good now and then too. The only difference is that I am actually conscious of the types of food I eat, and work out more when I do eat the bad foods (like the lobster pasta this weekend, pizza two days in a row after that and this yummy looking pastry sitting here waiting to be eaten). Or other times, I feel like it's okay to have soda and cake once in a while, as long as it's in moderation. A healthy balance is key - for everything.

In short, I think the determination to find the meaning of life and the ability to enjoy the ride that quest takes you on aren't mutually exclusive in every case so it's okay to take small detours along the way while you're searching for that "meaning". Life is definitely about enjoying the ride, but that doesn't mean that the destination can't also be something that you want to be meaningful.

Episode 1: More to life than paying bills and eating?

Lately I've been filled with a lot of ambitious feelings, but nowhere to really express them. I seem to go through this phase every so often. It starts off with me being a little anti-social so that I can have time to mope around and think about fluff, then decide that I'm tired of life as it is. Don't worry though, I'm not suicidal :)

Sometimes I think that I've finally figured out what I want to do in life, only to get sidetracked. Kind of reminds me of Dory from Disney's Finding Nemo.  It's almost like a long-term spazziness (apparently that's not a word - the word editor gave me the red dotted line :P).

At one point I thought I had decided that my calling in life was Computer Forensics (think CSI, but the computer version) so I went back to school for a second bachelor's degree, this time in Computer Science. After 2 years, I finished school and found a job doing software support for a financial investment company. I'm definitely thankful that they believed in me enough to hire me on straight out of school with no experience in the IT field, but somehow it's not quite what I had imagined. But of course, I got sidetracked (computer forensics? Maybe someday... I've been sidetracked for about a year and a half now :)). The money is tons better than the last full time job I had pushing papers for auto loans, but I'm getting to the point where money isn't fulfilling enough for me.

Yes, money is very important in life and that is why I'm still working this job. Bills need to be paid, and more importantly, I need some source of income to fund my Japanese/Asian snack obsession :)  Maybe it's because I do have a job that I'm able to say that money isn't everything, so I'm definitely thankful (especially now that I'm getting ready to be married and need to save up for the wedding).  I wonder though... there's gotta be more to life than just paying the bills and eating. (Yes, even eating! Blasphemy, right?)


I'm not thinking in terms of religion just yet though. Religion isn't something I'm ready to deal with if I'm not even sure who I think I am or what I truly believe in. That's a later philosophical discussion I think. For now, I just really wonder, what's the meaning of my life?

Trailer: What's in a Name?

You're probably all thinking what the hell, there goes Judi with her weird randomness again. Well, it's probably true. There is reason behind the madness sometimes though, and I feel as if this is one of those times.

Today, I was thinking hard about what I would most likely write about in my blogs... You know, so that you'd get an idea of what you're getting into when you come to this website. There were a few thoughts that came to mind that would be obvious if you know me: anime (but I'd bore most of you to death), Twilight (here I'd get a lot of rolling eyes), my Korean boy band crush DBSK (I'd have to wipe the drool from my keyboard), Macs (only 1% of you would understand where I’m coming from)... So what do I write?

In general, writing seems to help me sort out things that otherwise don't make sense in this crazy little mind of mine. Once it's on paper, it's easier to see where the dots connect (or don't in a lot of cases haha). So in my quest to understand this world - my world - I decided to name the blog The Meaning of Life With a Side of French Fries. Why french fries? Because it's random, and you know me, I love food. I'm probably one of the quirkiest people you'll meet so I'm sure some seriously non-meaning of life blogs will get posted at some point. (For example, anime, Twilight, DBSK, Macs...).

So there you have it. Thus begins my adventures in the search for the meaning of (my) life (and then some).